nothing and nothing means nothing
April 05, 2004 � 2:11 a.m.

First Entry Today

Today�s Weather: Lazy and content

Okay�this is going to REALLY jump all around so try to keep up, okay?

Just thought I�d warn you.

So I just got back from seeing HELLBOY with Jenny. I liked it a lot. It really wasn�t what I though it would be though. I could tell they kept it clean for the kids, which was a bit of a disappointment, because it actually had the possibility to be a major kick ass movie, but it really was cool as it was. Jenny enjoyed it�and I enjoyed it more being there with her. We really are like two big kids when we get around each other. We were throwing pop corn and making stupid comments back and forth. It was so much fun. Her girl called before we went and was going to see if she could make it out with us, but she couldn�t. She called again while we were in the movie and then again when we got out. Jenny was talking to her as she drove me home, and I got that jealous feeling again�mixed with some strange insecurity. I think Jenny sensed it, because I made a comment about how we need to hang out more before her girl takes her away from me, and she just made a noise and told me that would never happen. Even if they do get together, it won�t change a thing between us. That really made me feel better.

My brother ate my pork chop this morning when he got home from work. I was really looking forward to eating that damn pork chop, too. They were SO good last night, and I saved one just so I wouldn�t have to cook anything today. When I looked in the fridge and saw it gone, I was heated!! I mean, damn�all I wanted to do was laze around all day and then eat my pork chop before I went to the moves and that bastard ate it. Every time I saw him I would just say, �You ate my pork chop.� Damn�that shit was good, too.

What is it about the rain that makes me so�what�s the word�horny? All day, all I�ve wanted to do was lay in bed with someone, having crazy sex and only taking breaks to eat, go to the bathroom, and maybe snuggle up and watch a movie. I can�t even count how many times I thought about Swiz�wishing he would call�even if it was just a booty call�I don�t care. I just want someone�anyone to cuddle up with and spend the day away. Spend my life away.

If you can�t tell, I am bored as shit. My life is SO boring now!! Hardly no Jenny, no Swiz, no money to go anywhere�hell, no energy to go anywhere. I am just this big lump that comes home from work and stares at my boob tube for hours before passing out. Porn doesn�t even do anything for me anymore. I think I�m getting carpel tunnel from it or something. Plus it�s lonely and depressing. Even the corny plots in porn are better than my life. Now that�s just wrong.

I should be glad that my life is drama free at the moment, but I�m not good in these lazy lag times. It�s like�I get antsy�and I want to create the drama�you know? Like call Swiz or Cowboy�or whine to Jenny�or something. Maybe it�s because I�m not sleeping well. That just makes the time I�m awake more tedious. Up all night with nothing to do, nowhere to go�no one to talk to.

Geez�this entry sucks.

I�m going to go now before I bore you to tears and you never come back.

Please�come back�it�ll be better next time�promise!!

*sigh*

I really suck right now.