but seriously
August 12, 2004 � 2:23 a.m.

First Entry Today

Today's Weather: Black and gloomy with angry skies

You know, since Saturday, I have been in a shit storm of torment...and now that I am sitting down here to write, I am just noticing that my computer doesn't even have Microsoft Word on it. So Windows doesn't include Word?

*sigh*

I am too pissy to write now, but I have to put down what has been happening.

Get my computer back Saturday...WITHOUT THE FUCKING BURNER. I know, that was the whole reason all of this started, but when he put the burner in, the dvd's were all running too fast, so he took it out. So now I have to take the burner and the computer somewhere else to see if it is either the burner or it's just not compatible with the computer or that he just didn't have a fucking clue as to what he was doing.

Did I mention that I don't have any Microsoft programs on here? Well...I don't.

So now the computer is virus free, but all of the programs that I love are fucking gone and I don't have the money to buy the disks to get them back on.

Great, huh?

And Jenny emailed me this long bullshit letter at work telling me she has two jobs now and Cowboy has run up all her bills and isn't paying rent and has been ducking her, so she is changing the locks and selling his shit. He still hasn't given me back my shit. She told me she misses me and loves me and will call when she gets her new cell phone because she can't call me from her house. Sad part? The letter pissed me off and I didn't really give a fuck she wrote me. I still haven't written anything back...and I just might keep it that way.

Went to Walmart to get all the stuff I want from there for the new place. They didn't have most of the bathroom stuff I wanted. They didn't have the radio I wanted. I left the list at home, so I forgot some of the stuff I needed to get. So now I have to go back and make another lay away for the remaining shit...which isn't even all the shit I need. Yeah...I said law away. I'm a bitch on a budget that's broke and moving in two months. I can't afford to drop a load of cash at one time. And I hate lay away.

I went food shopping and to do the laundry on Sunday. Hot ass Sunday. I am not too sure I want kids anymore. Why are all kids in laundromats and super markets freaking snotty ass monsters? No...kids are more than likely off the menu for good. Seriously.

Take off work Monday for the funeral...the funeral that nobody told me the time or locale of...so I missed it. So instead of wasting a day, I go to the DMV and get another title since I can't find the original, and you know...the DMV must be where assholes and idiots are preferred employees. Some chick that didn't even know English told me all my paperwork was fine. Lady at the window, after standing in line for AN HOUR AND A HALF...tells me it's fine. 45 minutes later, I'm called to the cashier and am told that I need to go get a letter from the dealer saying the car was paid off. So I drive 30 minutes to pick up this peice of shit letter I could have written, drive all the way back, have to stand in line again, get to the window and the cockmaster has the nerve to give me attitude like it's not an "official" letter, so I get an attitude back and tell him the bitch in the other window said this was all I needed and she had called them before I left so if I needed something more elaborate she should have fucking told them so!!

So I get my title and go home.

Did I mention that after paying over $600 to get the car fixed, she now struggles once she goes over 45 miles and hour and sounds like she wants to blow up? Well, she does. And the pick up is total shit. Even when I have my foot to the floor, she still takes like a minute to start moving after I stop. This is not a great thing,,,especially since I am going fucking broke this week to get insurance on the damn thing.

FYI....I have 17$ to last me til next Thursday.

I had to ask Darryl for money to cover my super high electric bill (that is so high because he gets to lounge in air conditioning all day and i get to rast in my room at night while the front room is nice and cool) and to help with the insurance because I am so damn broke.

And the topper? Oh this is righteous...my mom calls me last night to inform me they found a "mass" in her brain, but didn't tell her when she was in the hospital and discharged her anyway, because they don't know what it is. Then, this morning, my father calls to tell us that she woke up with her side numb and her face drooping on one side, so they took her back to the hospital. I don't have a car to get to her. I am over here going fucking insane.

Plus...my cat won't eat her food and insists on clawing up my legs while screaming at the top of her lungs and I am about to come on my period so all I want to do is punt her into the next century.

How fucking great is my life right about now?

Jealous yet?