random mind shuffle 2
August 06, 2003 � 7:39 p.m.

Second Entry Today

Mood-A bit miffed at the moment

LimpFiona Apple

"I am going to spead as much time mourning this relationship as he did ending it.......okay, I'm over it!!"-Sex In The City

Recurring thought-Why should I care?

A classic "What the Fuck?!?!" moment- Monkey catching an attitude with me because I asked what it mattered if I didn't come in every Saturday. Shit only started because they didn't want me coming in full time on Friday and Saturday!! I can't have a fucking life? I get off one day a week and you want to give me shit because I have to get my car worked on after I've been here almost 3 years and have only called out 6 times?!?!

FUCK YOU DUDE!!!

YOU CAN KISS MY ASS!!!

***********************************************

I realized something this morning.

Silvie...my car...is not a "morning" car.

If I don't let her warm up for at least 10 minutes, she chugs along and damn near cuts off during turns until she warms up.

That is truely my car. I guess cars reflect the personalities of the owners just like pets do. My damn car has an attitude when she has to get up and go in the morning. Ain't that some shit?

Jenny and I are going to see Bad Boys II tomorrow. Mmmmmmmmmmm...luscious eye candy...good "alone time" material!

I'm still giddy from hearing from Swiz yesterday. I know something will come up and we more than likely won't get together this weekend, but the mere fact that he suggested it makes me go all gooey inside. Thinking about him makes me feel so happy. Not because I have any designs on a future with him either...no, that's not why. I am happy when I think of him because I feel good when I'm around him or just talking to him. I could easily float around him, just be his friend for the rest of my life, and be completely content.

Strange how that works, huh?

Satan called me earlier and had me cracking up here at work. That boy is a character! He really has some issues. I just hope my line wasn't being recorded because some of the things he said could really get him in trouble if it goes down. Oh shit...I'd be an accessory then, wouldn't I?

Damn!

I am trying to figure out a way to approach Cowboy about him giving me my stuff. If I go there next time and he is acting strange again, then fuck it, I'll just tell him straight out to give me my shit. But if we're still cool, I don't want to broach the subject and then make us "not cool" thusly putting Jenny back into the odd situation of never allowing us to be in the same place at the same time.

I don't know. I want to know why I have to even ask for my stuff when I gave him his stuff without him even saying anything to me.

I really don't want to start on that road right now. Even I am sick of talking about it, so whoever comes here must be sick of reading it.

Another thing I can't figure out is when did I start to care about who or how many people are reading my diary and what they think about it? I think I got sucked up in the whole "Sign me", "Click me", Rank me" rage that's going on. I admit, my diary is nothing special and I don't think I will ever be one of those people who basically write in theirs to entertain others. (I have a few that are like that on my faves...but some people just really do have hilariously entertaining lives!!) I do still want to get reviewed, though, even though I will probably get slammed, I still would like to know if my page is set up well, linked well, interesting...blah blah blah. I want to learn how to create my own temps and make banners and stuff, so if you know how and want to help a sista out let me know!!

Side note: Those who have me listed as a fave, thank you very much. I am honored. I read all of the ones I have listed as my fave whenever they update, but I especially read you guys everyday just waiting for an update.

I really hate my job sometimes. My boss Monkey (I call him that because he is covered from head to toe with hair. I am not kidding. He looks like a freaking little monkey! Cute though...just hairy as hell!) gets snitty with me when I asked why it mattered if I came in on Saturdays or not. I don't see what it matters. I come in every other Saturday and I still get almost 90 hours (which technically I am not supposed to be allowed to do) I can not take working sometime 10 hour days 6 fucking days a damn week because you don't want to show favorites. Show favorites?!? I may be late every day, but I am the ONLY one that works my hours, never leaves when my queues are full, never falls behind in my duties, will help do someone else's job and fixes everyone else's problems, or call out every other fucking day. I have called out 6 times. SIX FUCKING TIMES IN ALMOST THREE YEARS, and I still don't get any recognition for everything I do here. I am not appreciated here at all. Times like these, I really miss Satan. This is when he usually comes over to my desk, tells me some stupid story of does some assinine thing to make me smile or laugh. He's not here and nothing is as funny as it used to be anymore.

Things aren't as easy to dismiss or forget.

As much as I loathe to think about it, it may be time for me to start looking for a new gig. I love what I do here and all, but this place just has too much bullshit floating around for me to be really happy. Monkey will hate me forever, but hey, if he would stop acting like an ass and be a real boss then maybe we wouldn't have this problem. He's a nice guy and that's his problem. He let's the assholes walk all over him and then he takes it out on the ones that really stick by him and help him out. I know he doesn't mean to do it, but I am tired of getting undeserved bullshit thrown my way.

Well, I am going to head on home now. Fuck the work I didn't get to today. I am not killing myself at this place when I got a vodka shot waiting for me at home!!

Toodles and Kisses